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100-odd not-so-odd things I LOVE about myself

with 10 comments

I like this The Frisky post about 30 things you like about yourself so much that I spent my lunch hour yesterday thinking of the things I love about myself. I then sent my two BFFs the following sms: “OMG! I’m like, so much in EL OH VEE EE.”

I thought it’d be difficult to think of 30 things I like about myself but obviously it wasn’t that difficult. It helped to think of how I handle different situations. And I tried to see myself through someone else’s eyes.

I need to keep this list around for whenever I need some cheering up.

  1. I have learnt to love my curly hair. It’s OK and great to love curly hair but the transition from [nearly] hating it to loving it is what’s praiseworthy.
  2. I can talk about frivolous stuff as well as the deep stuff. It obviously depends on the situation and the person I’m talking to.
  3. I donate blood.
  4. I LOVE that my skin looks good even on closer inspection.
  5. Ideas excite me.
  6. I’m really just a big kid [child?] at heart. Gimme a swing and a jumping castle any day.
  7. I get awesome ideas like all.the.time.
  8. I have finally learnt to stick to a budget. It’s so freeing to be beholden to a budget.
  9. I am improving my net worth, even though it’s going to take a dip when I go away on a diiirty weekend…with myself.
  10. I try not to judge. And I don’t hate myself when I slip up occassionally.
  11. I can laugh at myself.
  12. I don’t laugh when someone hurts themselves.
  13. I can (mostly) handle criticism.
  14. I don’t get impatient with people who need some time to compose their answer.
  15. I’m beginning to understand what’s good for me.
  16. I LOVE that my crazy laugh is like, totally infectious.
  17. I pamper myself.
  18. I am assertive.
  19. ‘Why’ is my favourite word.
  20. I’m a nerd.
  21. I have made peace with my hips. I’m still working on the peace treaty with my tummy.
  22. I am an enthusiastic listener.
  23. I LOVE that I LOVE spending time with my niece.
  24. I’ll try most things at least once, kinda like Samantha from SATC.
  25. I can ask for help.
  26. I can bounce back from setbacks and learn from them.
  27. I am interested in stuff.
  28. I take care of my friendships.
  29. I can find cheap/free things to do when I’m Beyond Broke™
  30. I can forgive and forget.
  31. I love how I dress at least most of the time ;)
  32. I enjoy learning something new.
  33. I sometimes just don’t care what ‘they’ think.
  34. I’m trying to let go of my attachment to things.
  35. I can just enjoy doing nothing.
  36. I (sometimes) have excellent self-discipline.
  37. I can be a bit odd sometimes.
  38. I’m an awesome writer.
  39. I LOVE that I love so many things about myself.
  40. I don’t need to buy stuff to feel happy [about myself].
  41. I can compliment [random] people without expecting them to return the compliment.
  42. I demand the best service at all times.
  43. I can bargain.
  44. I give myself random hugs.
  45. I recruited myself to be my own cheerleader.
  46. I can market myself.
  47. I ask great questions from time to time.
  48. I do not torture my feet in ridiculous heels.
  49. I am learning to appreciate things for what they are.
  50. I am still figuring out the functions on my Sony Ericsson X1.
  51. I LOVE that I’m in love with myself.
  52. I tell outstanding waiters’ managers that they’re outstanding.
  53. I can lose myself in researching something on metal alloys or the difference between a recession and a depression.
  54. I love my job.
  55. I see the funny side of things.
  56. I send my BFFs random text messages that make them ROFL.
  57. I  can ‘conceptualise’ awesome article and  ideas [for work].
  58. I can see things from a different angle.
  59. I roll my r’s: it makes me ‘authentic’.
  60. I enjoy solitude.
  61. I LOVE that my blogging experiment is still happening after 3 years of ‘giving-it-a-try-to-see-whether-I-can-commit-to-something-for-longer-than-3-months’.
  62. I can find ways to minimise my workload.
  63. I’m OK with failing at something so that I can learn from it.
  64. I LOVE that I have such an expressive face.
  65. I give myself pep talks from time to time.
  66. I prefer ‘quality over quantity’.
  67. I LOVE looking at my PhD from The School of Hard Knocks and Tough Surprises that hangs over my desk at work.
  68. I enjoy being ‘bougie’.
  69. I really enjoy healthy food.
  70. I don’t do gossip.
  71. I enjoy scrubbing my kitchen floor.
  72. I’m getting better at Scrabble.
  73. I LOVE that I don’t even know how to spell ‘bored’.
  74. I enjoy exercise.
  75. I have goals and that I work towards achieving them.
  76. I can get ridiculously excited about [insert something random].
  77. I say what I mean.
  78. I hang out with people who ROCK. (I know, I know, I’m corny. Whatevs)
  79. I can fucking MURDER a Pac Man game.
  80. I read books on philosophy, economics or Afrikaans poetry to my niece.
  81. My breasts are awesome.
  82. I revel in my friends’ successes.
  83. I’m a bit of a girly girl.
  84. This list started off as “30-odd not-so-odd things I LOVE about myself”
  85. I fucking LOVE that I can do things by myself and not wait for someone to go to a movie/book launch/lecture/wine tasting with me.
  86. I allow my emotions some space.
  87. I’m learning what exactly I need in life.
  88. I’m getting over being sans a degree, though I still have lofty ambitions of teaching Philosophy AND Afrikaans AND History at Harvard.
  89. I’m forgiving myself for being such a fucking slacker [in high school] and for not getting that bursary that I never applied for.
  90. I can [sometimes] blag my way into [nearly] anything.
  91. I fucking LOVE that I feel no fucking need whatsofuckingever to get a car. Ever.
  92. I love silence.
  93. Ek is ‘n vrou van min woorde
  94. I don’t give a shit about labels. (Except LV, of course)
  95. I wear what fits me, ergo I don’t give a shit about ‘sizes’.
  96. I LOVE that, even at my ripe old age, I still get outraged over stuff.
  97. I make a mean spaghetti bolognaise
  98. I appropriate Bushisims.
  99. I’m starting to realise that men aren’t put off by smart women.
  100. And I am one of them women.
  101. I am grateful.
  102. I wait for people to exit the elevator before I get in.
  103. I don’t litter.
  104. I am a gadget freak who’s content to go without more gadgets: the insurance premiums…
  105. I am killing off my prejudices.
  106. I LOVE that I have a curated wardrobe.
  107. I give my mom stealth kisses.
  108. I talk to random people just sommer.
  109. I remain calm when the shit hits the fan.
  110. I am the most important person in my life.
  111. I love my strong jawline.

Written by Joy-Mari Cloete

April 16th, 2010 at 10:59 am

Posted in Random stuff

So I really am a digital immigrant

with 2 comments

So I did the Pew Reseach Centre’s Millennial test a couple of minutes ago and I have a ‘millennial score’ of 79%. This means I really am a digital immigrant.

You get the option to revise your answers to see your hypothetical score if you had answered differently.

In the past 24 hours, did you watch more than an hour of television programming, or not?

I don’t watch television much, and no, I didn’t watch much last night. Changing this answer to a ‘yes’ lowered my score. But in a world of PVR, should they not rephrase the question a bit?

In the past 24 hours, did you read a daily newspaper, or not?

They could’ve phrased this question a bit better. I’m assuming they want to know whether you’ve read a physical newspaper as opposed to an online one. I only sometimes buy a physical newspaper; I prefer reading online. But I used to subscribe to a few newspapers until last year. Changing this answer to a ‘yes’ lowered my score.

In the past 24 hours, did you play video games, or not?

I’d like to know what they define as ‘video games’. Is Lexulous on Scrabble a ‘video game’? If so, then my answer is yes. Video games need not just be first person shooter games. Changing this answer to a ‘yes’ raised my score.

Thinking about your telephone use, do you have…

Only a landline phone in your home Only a cell phone Both a landline and cell phone

So I get a lower score because I have both: I have Telkom ADSL and it kinda makes sense to use the landline from time to time. Changing this answer to ‘only a cell phone’ raised my score.

In the past 24 hours, about how many text messages, if any, did you send or receive on your cell phone?

No text messages on your cell phone in the past 24 hours 1 to 9 text messages 10 to 49 text messages 50 or more text messages

I don’t have my Sony Ericsson with me today but I know I sent more than 10 messages yesterday. Changing this answer to ’50 or more’ raised my score.

How important is being successful in a high-paying career or profession to you personally?

One of the most important things Very important but not the most Somewhat important Not important

It’s ‘very important but not the most’ important thing to me. So millennials value their career a lot because my score increased when I changed the answer to ‘one of the most important things.’

Do you think more people of different races marrying each other is a…

Good thing for society Bad thing for society Doesn’t make much difference for society

I would’ve chosen option D — ‘It’s neither good nor bad for society’. Not everyone gets married but we all have and want friends. I have few white friends and I sometimes wish this could change. But you become friends with people who are in close proximity to you — you work, live or play together. And right now that just aint happening.

But I chose option A — ‘Good thing for society’ in the end.

In the past 12 months, have you contacted a government official, or not? This contact could have been in person, by phone, by letter, by sending an email, or posting a message on their website or social networking page.

Yes, contacted a government official in past 12 months No, did not contact a government official in past 12 months

I responded to two of Helen Zille’s tweets last year and this year. And this means that I have a lower score. Why? Especially now that governments are invading the online space. Why would this hypothetical millennial not contact government officials?

Have you ever created your own profile on any social networking site such as MySpace, Facebook or LinkedIn, or haven’t you done this?

Yes, have created profile No, have not created profile

Yeah, and it’s funny that I deleted two of those profiles. But I’m back on Facebook for a bit or so.

How important is living a very religious life to you personally?

One of the most important things Very important but not the most Somewhat important Not important

I said it aint important. It’s also interesting that heathens score higher. Why do they assume that millennials do not value religion highly?

Were your parents married during most of the time you were growing up, or not?

Married Not married (includes divorced, separated, widowed or never married)

This is a difficult question because my biological dad never remarried. My mom remarried when I was 5 years old. So which answer should I choose? I chose number one. Oh, and changing the answer to ‘not married’ ups your score.

Do you have a tattoo, or not?

Yes No

Funny question, this one. What does tattoos have to do with being a millennial? I know 38-year-olds with tattoos. A shit load of them. But no, I don’t have any tattoos. Changing your answer to a ‘yes’ ups your score.

Do you have a piercing in a place other than your earlobe, or not?

Yes No

I would’ve chosen ‘not anymore’ or ‘not yet’. I used to have a nose piercing and I’m itching to get a new one. But once again, this isn’t just something that millennials do.

In general, would you describe your political views as…

Conservative Moderate Liberal

Funny, this. I’m kinda sure you can get conservative millennials, moderate millennials, and liberal millennials. I chose ‘liberal’, though I’m really a mix of conservative and liberal.

What is your age?

Under 18 18-29 30-45 46-64 65+

I chose ‘under 18′ because I don’t look a day older than 16 ;)

Written by Joy-Mari Cloete

February 25th, 2010 at 10:41 am

Posted in Random stuff

My granny likes my granny dresses

with 2 comments

I don’t see my granny often enough but when I do, I’m nearly always wearing one of my granny dresses. And then she’ll compliment me on it. My aunts also like my dresses and always jokingly ask me to give it to them when it no longer fits me. This is funny cause they’re all bigger than I am. Even my 20-year-old sisters like what I wear…

I was chatting to a pal last week and he told me that I shouldn’t wear such dresses: they don’t suit someone of my age and interested guys will be put off by it. Cause you see, some of the dresses skim my ankles and most of them leave a lot to the old imagination.

So here’s the thing: if a guy is put off by someone (as pretty as I am) in a vintage aka granny dress, what does that say about him? And should I ditch my ‘scooter uniform’ cause it makes me look as though I’m a car guard? Can we compare this to my dislike of Crocs? I don’t see how the two can be compared, though: we expect women to show cleavage and as much leg as possible; we don’t expect guys to do the same. So disliking Crocs can’t fall into the same category: we dislike Crocs because they’re ugly, not because they cover up skin that we’d like to see.

What do you think? Should I wear more revealing clothes or should I just wear whatever I feel comfortable in?

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Written by Joy-Mari Cloete

February 18th, 2010 at 4:46 pm

Posted in Random stuff

I am grateful

without comments

OK, let’s do this. FeistyFemale has written a blog post entitled Ten things you are truly grateful for. And she’s inviting us all to the partay.

So here goes:

  1. I am grateful for being able to move back home — with mom, dad, 2 sisters and a little one — to pay off some of my debt.
  2. I am grateful for having a job that (sometimes) excites me.
  3. I am grateful for having a wonderful man-friend who listens to me, who encourages me, who spoils me, who laughs with me.
  4. I am grateful for wilson toffees.
  5. I am grateful for being able to embrace me, ie, I embrace Joy-Mari with all her quirks and foibles.
  6. I am grateful for my Sony Ericsson Xperia X1!!!!!
  7. I am grateful for my quirky friends — I have few friends but the ones who have stuck it out with me have a penthouse suite in my heart.
  8. I am grateful for my scooter who gets me from point A to point B and sometimes even to point Z.
  9. I am grateful for Woolworths Rondos. And for sharing it with said man-friend.
  10. I am grateful for books, knowledge and learning.

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Written by Joy-Mari Cloete

July 16th, 2009 at 5:18 pm

Posted in Random stuff

Dear Jaywalkers

with one comment

Dear Jaywalkers,

Stay out of the fucking road. And please stay as far away from my scooter as you can. It is not funny when I have to yell at you. I get upset and it ruins my morning. But crashing into you could kill us both.

All I want is a bit of respect. All I want is that you respect yourself and use a pedestrian crossing. Or at least look to the left, then to the right, and then to the left again before you cross a road. Especially when there are cars, cyclists, scooter drivers and people on fucking superbikes. Those superbikes are far worse than my little Vuka Scuta.

So yeah. Let’s be friends and stay the fuck away from me.

Yours sincerely,

Joy-Mari Cloete

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Written by Joy-Mari Cloete

May 22nd, 2009 at 12:29 pm

Things that upset me

with 5 comments

Someone who sprays deodorant near me.

Someone who bumps into me. And doesn’t apologise.

Someone uses hateful and ableist language. The p-word, the s-word, the c-word, all of ‘em.

People who block my exiting an elevator.

Someone who says “Myself and Carl

People who use managerese.

Randoms who tell me to smile or ask me why I look angry. I won’t smile for you, arsehole.

Friends who cancel a meeting — at the last minute.

Someone who asks me whether I am crazy. I normally say “Yes, I am”.

Sms-speak in correspondence. Yes, even in sms messages.

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Written by Joy-Mari Cloete

April 30th, 2009 at 12:29 pm

I’m not bored of social media but…

with 2 comments

I was confounded when @PluginID told me he’s a bit off social media. This was only a couple of months ago. I couldn’t understand why but now I do: it’s draining. Not always but very often it feels as though you have to read, digg, vote for and tweet as much as possible. And that, friends, is draining.

Last week I tweeted that I may delete my MyFace account. Only @the_dre was in favour of me doing it; @sessa, @laurakim123 and @shahil were all rallying behind my keeping the account.

I deleted the account a half an hour after I had asked the question on twitter.

And I feel lighter. That MyFace account has seen too many misunderstandings between me and 2 of the people whom I were dating at the time. Yes, I caused the misunderstandings and fights by posting too many personal things on there but still.

So I think I’ll amend my social media mantra only slightly. I will lay off on Twitter, I no longer have a MyFace account, and I will blog more. I will still use Twitter, Friendfeed and whatever else is available but I will not use those channels excessively. Things have changed since I made a slip of the tongue  — too much of a good thing is not enough — my mantra. No more excess for this lady. A bit of mystique would do me good.

Update: It’s been nearly two days of no Twitter for me. And it’s been awesome.

Update on 28/02/2010: I deleted my Friendfeed account a couple of months after I wrote this post.

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Written by Joy-Mari Cloete

February 25th, 2009 at 10:23 am

What being coloured means to me

with 29 comments

  1. Being coloured means being watched by the store security guard much more closely.
  2. Being coloured means being expected to like Gatsbys.
  3. Being coloured means Afrikaansspeaking tannies are surprised about your ‘nice’ accent.
  4. Being coloured means the waiter assumes you’re European when you order steak tartare or a ristretto.
  5. Being coloured means spending too much money on hair relaxers and other straighteners, never mind the amount of time it takes to blow dry your hair.
  6. Being coloured means you were probably brought up on the wrong side of the tracks.
  7. Being coloured means people are surprised that you hadn’t been brought up on the wrong side of the tracks.
  8. Being coloured means people are surprised that you blog about grammar, language and stuff.
  9. Being coloured means car guards call your white friend Ma’am but they call you sista.
  10. Being coloured means being ashamed to admit you like R&B music to your white friends.
  11. Being coloured means people expect you to be happy. All the fucking time.
  12. Being coloured means getting shitty service.
  13. Being coloured means other people call you a ‘coloured’.
  14. Being coloured means you have to be strong[er].
  15. Being coloured means you might codeswitch.
  16. Being coloured means you live in two different worlds.
  17. Being coloured means having friends assure you that “you’re not like those other coloureds”.
  18. Being coloured means the SA Media only shows one side of your culture: the Cape Coloured.
  19. Being coloured means you should watch Girlfriends, not Sex and the City.
  20. Being coloured means denying that you’re a typical coloured.
  21. Being coloured means everyone dismisses your culture as non-existent.
  22. Being coloured means you have few positive role models in the media.
  23. Being coloured means you’re called a ’so-called coloured’.
  24. Being coloured means your blog does not get much linkjuice.
  25. Being coloured means having a R10 000 chip on your shoulder. Always.
  26. Being coloured means that ‘flesh colour’ stockings and bandages are too light.
  27. Being coloured means having to work harder at being nice.
  28. Being coloured means you always wonder “Is it cause I’m coloured?”
  29. Being coloured means people think you’re on Mxit when you’re posting a link to Twitter or Friendfeed.
  30. Being coloured means getting the table in the corner near the kitchen.
  31. Being coloured means you’re the only POC (person of colour) in the restaurant.
  32. Being coloured means your [white or black] friends don’t always get your cultural references.
  33. Being coloured means no-one comments on your blog.
  34. Being coloured means kak espressos and not getting a ‘Thank you’ from waiters. Ever.
  35. Being coloured means people are surprised that you read [books, blogs, newspapers, magazines].
  36. Being coloured means you wonder — sometimes aloud — where the coloured bloggers are hiding.
  37. Being coloured means people roll their eyes when you say something is race-related.
  38. Being coloured means you should go to Galaxy, not Asoka.
  39. Being coloured means acting more white when with whites, and more black when with blacks.
  40. Being coloured means being invisible.
  41. Being coloured means the waiter is surprised at the small/modest/large tip you give.
  42. Being coloured means people assume you got your accent at a Model C school.
  43. Being coloured means people assume you are religious.
  44. Being coloured means people assume you speak Kombuis Afrikaans.
  45. Being coloured means people assume you speak Kitchen English.
  46. Being coloured means ’shopping while coloured’, ‘driving while coloured’, hell, even ‘walking while coloured’.
  47. Being coloured means hoping to marry a white person so that the future children will have lighter skin, grou oë en ‘n betere draad hare.
  48. Being coloured means having to defend AA and BEE ad nauseam.
  49. Being coloured means not knowing who you are.
  50. Being coloured means tipping too much cause you want better service next time.

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Written by Joy-Mari Cloete

January 13th, 2009 at 9:58 am

In which I learn to ask

with 3 comments

There is something you need to know about me: I’m always trying to find new blogs to add to my Google Reader and Foxmarks accounts. I cleaned up my bookmarks last week and got rid of many meh blogs and websites. I even cleaned up my del.icio.us account, which I have not used for more than two years.

I call this the new phase of The Royal Joyfulness. This is me wanting to know more, be a better human and, well, know more about everything.

So I’ve been busy reading up on SEO — I work at Shake Interactive, bru — and marketing. This is besides the normal reading up on writing and new media. I signed up for a Twitter account in August? and even got myself a FriendFeed account last night. It was an awesome night of interwebbing.

Be nice and send me some awesome links to blogs and stuff that you like. I promise I’ll get excited and spend the entire evening reading an awesome new blog.

Things I am interested in:

  • Search engine optimisation
  • Marketing
  • Languages
  • Writing
  • Personal development
  • Career development
  • Hacking
  • Fashion

If you liked this post, feel free to leave a comment below. Get free updates to my blog with my RSS feed or follow me on Twitter.

Written by Joy-Mari Cloete

October 31st, 2008 at 1:09 am