Would overtipping waiters prevent bad service?
If you follow me on Twitter — @joycloete — you’ll know that customer service is something I tweet about often. It could be because I used to be in some sort of customer service job for more than 6 years. Or it could be because of that R10 000 chip on my shoulder. I have been in search of that perfect shot of espresso or — if I can find it — ristretto since the beginning of last year.
So I go everywhere: restaurants, coffee shops, hotels. And I sit down, hoping to get good bean juice. And sometimes I’ll get it, too. Good bean juice. But what I get most often is indifference from the waiter. And that’s on a good day. A bad day could mean not getting a ‘Hi’; it could mean getting a table tucked away from the rest of the diners; it could even mean being called ‘dear’.
True, these aren’t all signs of racism. But when all of them apply to a single dining experience you start to wonder “is it cause I’m coloured?”. And then you wonder whether it would help to enlighten the waiter or the manager. It’s often the small things you notice: not getting as much attention as the rest of the diners; a frown on the waiter’s forehead when you order or ask for anything; and not being offered bread or given a menu.
I’m a single POC woman, which means I dine alone. Mostly. I could spout many statistics to show that waiters and retailers do not care much for my group. Come on, we eat alone, which means the bill won’t be high. We’ll probably sit there for more than an hour reading the newspaper or posting updates to Twitter. And — stereotype alert — we’re not great tippers (this is true for most of us, btw). We’re difficult, too: we’re angry coloured women.
So I’ve been trying to dispel this stereotype. I’m not overly pleasant but I’m possibly one of the better customers your brand can have — I know what I want and I’m not afraid to ask for it. Mediocre service gets 5% – 10% – if that much — and a love letter about why I had given that little. I know how waiters moan when they get pathetic tips; I used to be one. Good service gets 15% – 20% and excellent service gets anything from 25% – 40%, depending on the size of the bill. On a few occasions I have even tipped the waiter more than 100% on a small bill.
Now, see, 25% – 40% is waaaaay above the average. Hell, most waiters would be happy with a 15% tip. But I somehow got it into me that tipping more than the average would get me better service. Wrong. It doesn’t. Whoever told you that is a fool. Or the person who told you that is white and has probably never had to deal with stealth racism.
POC should really up the amount they tip for good service. Come now, people. There’s no need to go overboard. Just tip decently so that we can get rid of these stereotypes. And then we can finally enjoy an espresso at the fancy restaurant and not demand to see the manager.
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How do you know it’s specifically race related, and not that the vast majority of service personnel seem to have been lobotomised at a young age?
Because other patrons get far better service, ie, they get menus; they get a ‘thank you’; and the waitron makes eye-contact with them.
I used to be a waitress, so I know how waitrons think. Coloured, Indian and black people were singled out as the ‘bad tippers’ and some waitrons refused to serve them.
Maybe if you tipped BEFORE it would great better service or went back to the same restaurant with the same waiter?
I also spent 10 years waitressing – I served black people who were amongst the highest tippers – so it all kinda depends on the people I suppose!
Why don’t you try U&Me Coffee Clothing and Conversation at the top of Long Street. They opened on New Years eve and seem to have gotten all the basics just right.
Hint: try their take on Cappucino
I don’t tip automatically. And I only frequent restaurants where I get good service. Also I find being friendly to waitrons helps. Most times, they’re stressed for one reason or another but if you treat them nicely, they generally respond likewise. And if I get excellent service I’ll tell the manager…
All this adds up to really good relationships with restaurant staff and excellent dining experiences.
What’s POC? And yes, I Googled it first. lol!
does this live in the same box with the gorgeous happy person I met a couple of nights ago? *more confused*
Aha! Lightbulb moment! Person Of Colour. Right.
Guess that makes me PONC. Un-coloured. Uh..Eeuw. I’m coloured … *indignant* Pink is a colour!
Hey! isn’t this what we’re *not* meant to care about anymore? *confused* And. HTH (see, I can do it, too
Kidding aside. Waitrons are there to serve you. Not because it’s their station in life, cos it’s their job. I normally tip generously, especially on small bills, and 20% is a kind of standard for bigger, but I will not hesitate to not tip, or have an attitude adjusting word with one who needs it. And I have no problem embarrassing an in-attentive waitron from across a room. I’d prefer not to, of course, but this is not a fucking democracy. I’m the customer. If that sits badly, find another line of work.
At the same time, there’s a flip side to this. Pale males like me get a significant level of ‘tude from many POC waitrons, cashiers etc. (Note. Somehow, I look Afrikaans, apparently. WTF? This exacerbates the ‘tude. How’d I know? When people begin by speaking to you in Afrikaans, it’s a sure sign) I personally choose to deal with it by dialling down my own sensitivity levels. That leaves me free to fight when it’s worth it, and let the other person work out their demons on me, when it’s not, with almost no mental stress. They don’t like me cos I’m white (and I look Afrikaans..). See? Didn’t faze me at all. Screw up my order, and we’ll dance, you and I. Ignore/be condescending to my date cos she’s a POC (!) and I my Shiva persona *will* be in attendance.
Now that was all about me, and I suspect you’d be hard pressed to extract a direct answer to your question. So. No, I don’t think the big tip wins the day.
1. It happens after the fact (yes, there’s learned behaviour, but still…),
2. No matter how generous, the tip is never going to be enough to reverse the effects of social engineering.
That’s all I have
)
@laurakim123: Yes, you are absolutely correct. It depends on the people.
@YouKnowWho: I’ll go have a look on Saturday. Thank you. I really prefer espressos but I’ll have a cappuccino just to test.
@Amod: Hey! I absolutely agree. I stay away from restaurants and coffee shops when I’m having a bad day. My mood is normally neutral when I go have coffee. And I also let managers know when the waitron was excellent. But it’s not always possible to be served by the same person. Pity.
@André: Hey, hey, hey! You do look Afrikaans. I don’t know why but I assumed you’re Afrikaans. Forgive me?
I never realised that some POC act condescendingly towards white patrons. I’m sorry and saddened to hear that.
I myself am a POC, according to race dividers, but i see myself as a person, with a white boyfriend, black family members and friends as well as coloureds. I frequent coffee shops, restaurants, hotels etc, my drink of choice however is an iced mocha, if i am alone i still get really great service. I am friendly by nature and find that if you greet someone with a real sense of goodness, you’ll get that back. Hence always getting fantastic service regardless of skin tone. I have noticed though, that some snobbish type people get poor service, but that’s only fair. They seem to expect a servile approach when waiting on them. My rule of thumb is treat them with respect and they will follow suit.
In sum it is not about race, rather about attitude and personality. Next time you search for the perfect espresso, be nice to them upon arrival – and you might just find yourself the most perfect espresso as well as flawless service. It always works for my curly hair mocha skin toned self!
Hey, Nicole.
Curly hair and a mocha skin tone, hey?
Being pleasant doesn’t always work, and isn’t always possible. I’m civil and I’m spending money; that’s enough, right?
I can give you too many examples of sitting down at a restaurant and receiving a menu or my order from a waiter whose face is turned away from me. Or just being ignored.
The customer shouldn’t need to be friendly; the waiter should be friendly at all times.
Hey there
I believe the source of most bad experiences are waiters who would rather be somewhere else or day dreamt through customer service 101. They have no passion or interest in what they do and just want to get their day over and done with.
However being POC male myself, lf I have made the unfortunate race experience on multiple occasions. My strategy – screw them. Out of principle I stick it out and they just have to serve me. Their reward is my tip of the day – don’t look into the sun.
To avoid bad service I try to set-up a pleasant experience by greeting them by the first names if they have a badge or enquiring if they don’t. I generally make a bit of small talk – you’d be surprised how far that goes.
In general I think you pay for service i.e. the more expensive the restaurant the better the service. Well I suppose that’s been my experience anyway. The best service I ever received – Beluga in Green Point.
Hey, Andre. Yeah, I do that, too. My best dining experience? Cape Heritage Hotel. I can’t wait to go back there. But no, more expensive doesn’t always mean good service.
[...] a customer service crusader and I have been known to send an espresso back three times. That intimidates restaurant managers [...]